What Does Being Unequally Yoked Actually Mean?

Over the weekend my wife and I had a brief discussion about the meaning of being unequally yoked. The conversation came about because she had been reading Paul’s letter to the Corinthians, where in Chapter 2 he explicitly states “To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her. And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.” (NIV)

The unambiguous message in the text is that it is not a valid excuse to leave your spouse just because they leave the faith. Yet, as I read about on the subject, it is clear that there are many marriages where one spouse leaving the faith while the other does not often creates a situation where divorce is inevitable. I think that is sad and it leaves me with the conclusion that my wife and I are in the minority.

What’s this got to do with Yoking?

Well, later on in Corinthians is another unambiguous instruction “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?” (NIV)

The first sentence is clear; do not be yoked with unbelievers. Here is that same sentence in other versions:

  • Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers. (NLT)
  • Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers (KJV)
  • Be not unequally yoked with unbelievers (ASV)
  • Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers (ESV)

I think the word ‘unequally’ dramatically changes the meaning of that sentence. Without it, the instruction is clear, don’t mix with the heathen; with it, is the implication that it is possible for a Christian to be equally yoked with an unbeliever. (I’ll skip over the question of whether unbeliever means atheist or just not a Christian but feel free to comment on that part if you wish to.)

‘Unequally’ has a bearing on the sentences that follow. One meaning implies that all unbelievers are wicked and nasty; the other that it is only the wicked and nasty unbelievers that should be avoided; unbelievers that are not wicked and nasty are okay. For me, it’s the latter that makes more sense because how on earth would it be possible to evangelise if Christians can’t mix with unbelievers? However, the insinuation that all non-believers are wicked and nasty is deeply unhelpful; even if it is not a correct interpretation, there are many Christians who believe it and there are many Churches where that message is preached.

It is highly unfortunate that a single word can make such a difference to this sentence and that it is missing in some modern translations. It is precisely this sort of thing that creates difficulty for the biblical literalist.

I had always been of the impression that the being yoked means marriage, but the context of this instruction does not implicitly state marriage and so I now think it means more than just marriage. More than that, I think it reads more appropriately as referring to a business type relationship. This item at Grace Central (http://www.gracecentered.com/unequally_yoked.htm) seems to agree, though it is not a completely thorough analysis. I do find the explanation of the original Greek very interesting, especially as it does seem to support my current position on the matter.

While there certainly does seem to be guidance towards avoiding marriage with a non-Christian, I think it’s a major stretch to assume that a marriage between a Christian and a non-Christian comes under the banner of being unequally yoked.

So What does it Actually Mean?

Well it doesn’t mean have no association with non-Christians whatsoever, despite the unfortunate language in some versions.

My thoughts are that it advises against close or dependent partnerships (not specifically or necessarily marriage) with those who would take advantage of you or have vastly different motives. This would seem to be good advice for anyone regardless of the religiosity of either partner.

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5 thoughts on “What Does Being Unequally Yoked Actually Mean?

  1. I have contemplated those very verses very deeply and done a bit of research on them myself. Having studied it I found several different interpretations of it, BUT, this was a letter to the church at Corinth. The way I understand it, the church itself was accepting monetary donations from(a la Acts) and associating with pagans. That in and of itself would not have been a problem but in return those pagans expected to mix in their worship of idols with Christian worship which the Christians were apparently joining in on. He is admonishing them not to bind themselves together with those unbelievers because they have different agendas. Hence the reference to Belial. He specifically says ” What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?” v16

    It is helpful to remember that Corinth was a pagan society and dropping their old habits as new Christians proved difficult for the Church to do.

    • I just wanted to say that it is all quite muddled and this is only part of what led me to question my faith. I found this reference and this one. There are such varying interpretations by the Holy Spirit of these passages it makes it almost impossible unless you research what was actually happening in the church at Corinth to make head or tales of it. Even then it is only a best guess.

    • A most excellent point D’Ma.

      In my brief searching around I found many comments linking the phrase specifically to marriage and relationships but not a single comment on the point you raise.

      I think that once you realise that it was a specific instruction to the church in Corinth regarding their association with pagans the context becomes blindingly clear. Its not about marriage its about inviting pagan practices into the church.

      Parallels with ladies having to wear hats in church anyone?

  2. Pingback: The Equally Yoked « Ascended Thoughts

  3. This makes sense…..Maybe we shouldnt even think about calling ourselves Christians or god followers unless we realize what is required of us and we are willing obey the requirements. It seems more beneficial and more satisfying to follow god than to follow man. We can even calling it following “good” if we are not into following god beut god is in fact good anyway!

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